Not quite sure how to feel yet

I had my follow up GYN appointment for the adenomyosis this afternoon. It's not as good as I hoped for. The adeno is throughout my uterus and not just in my c-section scar. My doc said that with no treatment it won't be long before my pain increases and I start bleeding more. My mind is screaming for me to get pregnant right now, but it's still not quite the right time yet. We really have to get our finances more under control and I want to drop at least another 20 pounds before I get pregnant again. He also told me that a VBAC is pretty much out of the picture because of the state of my uterus. If I got pregnant right away, I'm also at an increased risk of Placental Acreta. The risk is already higher for me because of the c-section that I had with Michael and recovering from a hysterectomy on top of a c-section, a newborn, and a toddler is not something I want to consider.

He gave us three treatment options: (a) do nothing, (b) Lupron, or (c) hysterectomy. Hysterectomy is right out since we want to have at least one more child. Doing nothing will result in the adeno spreading and getting progessively worse causing more pain and increased bleeding. I really think the Lupron is not going to be for me. The drug simulates menopause, which will allow my uterus to heal and the endometrial cells that have run amok there to die, thus firming up the muscle. The problem is that I have an *extensive* history of mental illness, and even low dose birth control makes me crazy, I can't even begin to imagine what a chemically induced menopausal state will do to me. I've decided to get a second opinion on my treatment options from a doc who specializes in maintaining fertility. There has to be another drug tretment option out there that will not result in my being hospitalized or in complete mental misery for six months.

I asked for a copy of the MRI report and found out some other interesting things. While I was pregnant, I was convinced that I had Symphysis Pubis Dysfunction, but my OB blew me off saying it was just on the bad end of normal pregnancy pain and the chiropractor I went to see basically told me not to read stuff on the internet. The MRI report says that I have moderate to severe degeneration of my pubic symphysis, which is a nice validation. This time around, chiropractic treatment throughout my pregnancy is going to be a high priority. The report also revealed that my bone marrow looks like I have anemia. I only found this out from reading the report and am a bit miffed that my GYN didn't even mention it. I'm going to call my PCP this week and see about getting an H&H and a CBC done to confirm and then treat - if I am anemic, just treating it could make a world of difference.